literature

three weeks on

Deviation Actions

Published: Jan 16, 2010

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Literature Text

Three weeks on, and flat, packed mounds of snow-turned-ice still fill the pavements in curved patterns like inverse puddles: the last remnants of a slowly lifting cold spell. People walk with their heads down, chins tucked into scarves, navigating safe routes around the ice. Calls from home talk of Christmas cake still holding out and Dad's port almost finished. The wind is starting up, clearing out dusty streets and hurrying along clouds of old smoke and snow.

a million stars
one reindeer still blinks
from a distant rooftop

my first haibun. thoughts and critique appreciated :]

this is an entry for #the-haiku-club's current saijiki contest.

form: haibun
region: france
season: winter
category: the season
kigo: the mistral
description: wikipedia gives a good explanation: "The mistral is usually a dry wind, and its arrival almost always clears the skies and dries the air. [...] In less than two hours, the sky can change from completely covered to completely clear. The mistral also blows away the dust, and makes the air particularly clear, so that during the mistral it is possible to see mountains 150 kilometers and farther away."
for me this symbolises clearing away the old to bring in the new, with the new year and new, not necessarily warmer, but clearer and fresher climates coming along. remnants of christmas still linger though!

sorry for the long explanation.